Dry Dates: 10 Women Speak Candidly About Dating Someone Who Doesn’t Drink

Written By Elizabeth Ervin

Today is a great day to be sober. Thanks for stopping by.

Would you date someone who doesn’t drink alcohol? Someone asked a group of women in an online forum how they felt about dating a man who doesn’t drink. Here is how they responded.

1. You Don’t Need To Make Excuses

happy woman OK
Image Credit: Shutterstock.

One woman exclaimed, “I think yay! I won’t have to make excuses about why I’m not drinking. People can react so bizarrely to hearing you’re not going to voluntarily make yourself more vulnerable and manipulatable, leaving you feeling like garbage the next day.

There are so many reasons why people don’t drink. For example, I have a reflux disorder that makes me vomit if I have a couple of glasses of wine. So I don’t because I don’t think it’s worth it. My only flag would be if they also said I wasn’t allowed to drink, even though I don’t. I don’t take kindly to people trying to control me.”

2. Can I Still Drink?

Image Credit: Deposit Photos – IgorVetushko.

On that note, another asked, “Are they going to have a problem if I have a drink occasionally or we go to a party? How would they feel about being asked to be a designated driver once or twice a year?

If they’re not going to be judgy jerkface about people who drink responsibly, then it’s not an issue. If they’re going to be a jerk, that’s the problem, not their opinion on drinking.”

3. There Are Various Reasons People Don’t Drink

Image Credit: Deposit Photos – AsierRomeroCarballo.

“That is not a red flag for me,” shared one. “They could be doing it for various reasons: religious, health, or personal preference. Now if the reasons behind it are something like they’re an alcoholic and constantly battling to keep their sobriety, then I’m probably not a compatible partner for them.

I homebrew and make wine and ferment/distill other alcohols. I bartend on occasion. I have a healthy and intentional relationship with alcohol. But I would be a challenge to their sobriety.”

4. It Depends On Their Attitude

Image Credit: Deposit Photos – Krakenimages.com.

Another woman confessed, “I dated a guy who was so self-righteous about his not-drinking that I could barely take him anywhere. So like, fine, don’t drink – but don’t lecture my family at dinner! It depends entirely on their behavior on the subject, not on the decision itself regarding alcohol.”

5. I Wish I Found These People

Image Credit: Deposit Photos – Vadymvdrobot.

“I wish I found people like that,” one asked, “Do you know how many friends and dates have ghosted me because I don’t like to party?” Another admitted, “Same here. I have gone back and forth listing it on my profile, but in the end chose to include it because my not drinking is a deal breaker for some people, and I don’t want to waste my time.”

6. Two Thoughts

Image Credit: Deposit Photos – deagreez1.

One woman explained her two thought process. Thought one: Great! Me neither! Thought two: What are your reasons?” A second agreed and added, “Yup! And thought number two determines the flag colors. If it’s because they’re Mormon or practice any high-demand religion, it’s a red flag for me no matter how laid back they are.”

7. Not My Thing

Image Credit: Deposit Photos – kues.

“I respect people’s decisions, but I wouldn’t personally mesh well with someone who doesn’t drink. I’m all about having a few beers on a summer afternoon,” one suggested. Several people noted that just because someone doesn’t drink doesn’t mean they have an issue around drinkers.

However, they argued, “Yeah, but it’s an actual activity, and it’s nicer when someone is a participant versus being a spectator. Not condemning a non-drinker. Just a different vibe.”

8. How Do They Feel About Others Drinking?

Image Credit: Deposit Photos – info.zonecreative.it.

“I think it depends on their feelings about mine and others’ drinking,” one explained. “I like to go out with friends regularly, and we hang out at bars. Not everyone gets an alcoholic beverage while out, but we have alcohol.

I have a stocked liquor cabinet at home as I like to host cocktail parties. I want to be with someone who would enjoy these events. Of course, they don’t need to drink alcohol, but I want them to be a part of the group.”

9. It’s Not a Red Flag

Image Credit: Deposit Photos – konradbak .

One woman admitted, “I don’t find this to be a red flag at all, even if they are a recovering alcoholic or came close to alcoholic tendencies and felt it was wise to go sober.

I would not feel turned off. On the contrary, if their dedication to sobriety were evident and long-term, it would be a positive sign that they carry a level of personal responsibility. I would be 100% supportive of that.”

10. I Prefer It

excited woman yes
Image Credit: Shutterstock.

Finally, many women in the thread agreed with the statement, “I’d prefer it. I’m sober.” Hell YEAH! That is a remarkable achievement and the most important one in your life. You’re freaking rad.

This thread inspired this post.

30 Serious Things In Everyday Life That People Do Not Take Seriously Enough

conceited selfish
Image Credit: Shutterstock.

Today’s world is plagued with serious issues that people do not take seriously enough. After an individual asked an online forum for examples of this, these were the responses heavily discussed.

20 Typical Phrases That Will Make People Instantly Dislike You

Image Credit: Deposit Photos – maxximmm1.

Are there any phrases or sentences that make you immediately dislike a person once it comes out of their mouth? You’re not alone. After someone asked an online forum for examples, these phrases were voted top of the list.

25 Incredible Films That Force You to Cry Every Time You Watch Them

Ghost Patrick Swayze Demi Moore
Image Credit: Paramount Pictures.

Are you searching for a great film to get your beautiful eyes to tear up? I’m a sucker for a good cry fest. So here are 25 movies that make me cry every time I watch them. Will they get your eyes wet too?

The Top 11 Things Men Want to Know About Women But Are Afraid to Ask

Image Credit: Deposit Photos – guruxox.

Someone recently asked an online men’s forum, “Men, what is something about women you are curious about but too afraid to ask?” Here are their best responses.

20 Truths in Life Youngsters Aren’t Ready To Hear According to Boomers

happy older couple sheltering from sun
Image Credit: Shutterstock.

Recently in an online forum, someone asked the older generation, “What are the teenagers of today not at all ready to hear?” Here is how they responded.

This post was produced and syndicated by Sober Healing.

Website | + posts

Elizabeth Ervin is the owner of Sober Healing. She is a freelance writer passionate about opioid recovery and has celebrated breaking free since 09-27-2013. She advocates for mental health awareness and encourages others to embrace healing, recovery, and spirituality.