Men often get a bad reputation for reducing women to their physical attributes, but they’re not all like that. A recent discussion in an online men’s forum outlined several personality traits men find seriously attractive aside from physical appearance. Here are their honest confessions.
1. Her Sense of Humor
A good sense of humor is heavy in the thread. One man specifies he prefers a dark sense of humor. Finally, another states, “My wife is the funniest person I know. She cracks jokes I wouldn’t think of.
She gets the weird jokes I make that no one else would get. And she has this amazing ability to make jokes about people in a way that bigs them up – she’ll never make fun of somebody – she only uses her power for good.”
2. Her Intelligence
It’s no surprise that countless men prefer brains over beauty. But it’s fantastic to hear that the brain is the beauty to so many. Nobody argues that finding an intelligent woman is much more attractive than finding a woman who is into her looks but holds no substance.
3. Her Honesty
“Honesty. Very basic but true,” says one. “An honest woman is someone I very much find attractive. And I’m not meaning honest in a way that makes them feel better about themselves or honest in a way to hurt people intentionally, but honest in a truly caring way, such as pointing out small issues someone may have when it comes to respecting others or being honest about issues they may have in relationships and so on.”
4. Her Accountability
Accountability, one suggests. Suppose a woman can openly admit when she’s wrong or screwed up. In that case, that’s attractive as it shows maturity and the ability to judge yourself impartially. Moreover, it means you are less likely to repeat the mistake. “It also means what you feel for her is not only love, it’s respect, which is just as important.”
5. Hey Joy
Countless men find a woman who finds joy in what she does very attractive. One clarifies, “And talking about it with passion. A woman liking her job and talking about her day with you with passion and joy is attractive and heartwarming.”
6. Her Singing Voice
I love singing and appreciate this confession. A man explains that his wife claims she “can’t carry a tune in a bucket.” However, it’s beautiful to his ears. He elaborates he’s been a musician his whole life and believes he has reasonably good judgment on vocal quality. “So when we have a couple of drinks, I’ll get my guitar out and can occasionally convince her to sing a few songs with me. It’s one of my favorite things we do.”
7. Her Principles
Many men confess that a woman with similar values and principles is essential and attractive as all get out. “It’s a way to minimize unnecessary discussions and keep harmony while enjoying each other’s company.”
8. Her Calmness
Do you find a calm presence attractive? A man admits that nothing is sexier than when a woman remains level-headed when things go awry. He notes that having stability and reliability in a partner, including their reactions, is much hotter than anything physical.
9. Her Financial Literacy
According to the forum, financial literacy is very attractive when coupled with being financially responsible and making smart purchasing decisions. “Not just spending every cent you earn on junk with an expensive logo on it.” Someone asks, “How fast can you fill out your taxes?” Before another user replies, “You took it from 0 to 1040 real quickly.”
10. Her Optimism
Numerous self-proclaimed pessimists confess they find optimism in a woman incredibly sexy. However, multiple people argue that it’s important not to bring your partner down. Balance is crucial for this relationship to work.
11. Her Critical Thinking Skills
Critical thinking is one thing, but toss in a side of curiosity, and the men in this thread vote you’re a ten on the hotness scale. Nobody wants to be around someone they can’t engage in honest conversation with who can’t hold their own in subject matter and materials.
12. Her Confidence
Confidence is attractive to countless men who place heavy emphasis on this hotness. On the contrary, being in a relationship with someone who constantly requires reassurance, praise, and affirmation is exhausting.
13. Her Work Ethic
A woman’s work ethic and drive are a turn-on for many men in the forum. One clarifies, “My wife works her bum off to help provide, and it’s sexy. Half the time, she inspires and motivates me to get my bum in gear. And it goes further than her job—she does everything she does with purpose.”
14. Her Passion
Having a hobby or interest you’re very knowledgeable and passionate about is a massive green flag. A man says it doesn’t matter if it’s benign, like painting nails. If it’s something she can “ramble on about,” he is hooked.
A second contributor agrees, noting many times when he asks a woman what she does in her spare time for fun, they reply with Netflix or social media scrolls. Finally, he’ll rephrase the question and engage in creative hobbies they do when not relaxing, and “it’s like they don’t understand the difference.”
15. Her Attentiveness
I’m married. However, judging by several threads I’ve read, dating these days is often met with phone interruptions and blatant scrolling while not engaging with each other. One man shared that he was ecstatic that he had a date recently, and the woman never took her phone out of her purse. The attentiveness to being present was a significant turn-on.
16. Her Self-Sufficiency
Being self-sufficient is a hot commodity that numerous men praise in women. One explains they have no desire to date a dependent. Nevertheless, several clarified yes to independent women. But no to those who make it their entire identity. “See Instagram bio: Miss Independent.”
17. Her Laugh
Awe, I love this next man’s response where he confesses that his wife’s laugh is “everything.” Next, he elaborates that he hears her cracking up from down the hall while she watches shows in the bedroom, and he loves it. Others add they, too, find women’s laughter attractive. Even the “unapologetic honks.” Finally, one says, “If your girl snorts when she laughs, she’s a keeper.”
18. Her Emotional Intelligence
Being emotionally intelligent and mature, including having kindness and empathy, can go a long way for many men in the forum. One elaborates, “It shows me that you are capable of being a decent person towards myself/others and that you won’t be someone who I have to be careful around.”
19. Her Boundaries
Boundaries are hot to a number of men in this online forum, and not having boundaries is a significant red flag. A woman should know what she wants, what she doesn’t want, and what she refuses to put up with. She needs to know her worth.
20. Her Voice
According to one man, “A woman can look stunning, but opening her mouth reveals who she truly is. To know if a woman is intelligent, funny, angry, depressed, or even sexy, I don’t need to see; I need to hear. So above all else, as a man, I try to listen.”
The second best advice he ever received about dating was to get the other person to talk to ask leading questions. The first, of course, is to make them laugh.
And a woman’s laugh, too, will reveal so much about them. Authenticity and genuine character do not look like anything he has ever seen, but he can hear them.”
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Elizabeth Ervin is the owner of Sober Healing. She is a freelance writer passionate about opioid recovery and has celebrated breaking free since 09-27-2013. She advocates for mental health awareness and encourages others to embrace healing, recovery, and spirituality.