Do you have insecurities that may be poking through with your behavior? You’ve got company. A recent online discussion addressed things that signal to everyone around you that you’re insecure. Here is their list.
1. When You Always Apologize
One sign of insecurity is when you constantly apologize about everything you say or do when you’ve not even done anything to apologize about. I’ve caught myself doing this in my youth, and it comes with being too hard on yourself and beating yourself up over everything.
2. When You Never Apologize
On the contrary, never apologizing is also an insecure and toxic trait that will damage long-term relationships. Therefore, one emphasizes “Making excuses and even twisting the facts but never apologizing” is an obvious tell.
3. When You Check Your Partner’s Phone
This one is interesting. My husband and I know each other’s passwords and have no issue grabbing for each other’s phones. For example, if we want to Google something, it’s nothing to grab the phone closest to you and Google it. However, I can see why digging through someone’s phone constitutes insecurity and trust issues.
4. When You’re Unnecessarily Aggressive
Aggression in situations where it’s not justified. Like if someone is afraid of being unable to protect themselves and decides to attack first. One notes that screaming at and berating service personnel is one of the best examples.
5. When You Need To Be in Control
Several people agree with one who states that when you need to be in control regarding the terms of friendships and relationships, the sense of control you must have shows their lack of security.
6. When You Show Off in Your Car
Countless individuals agree with one who suggests that loudly revving your engine “Every time you pass another person” is an insecurity. “And gunning it at every green light….so small.” One comment made me laugh out loud, “At every light, bro? You’re Starbucks and Instagram posts can wait. There’s no cooler of organs in the back.” Others state that big trucks are another tell of being insecure.
7. When You Have Couple Social Media Accounts
Do you know any couples who share social media accounts? According to many in the forum, that is a sign of insecurity. Do you agree? I’ve known a few who shared accounts, and I always thought it was more of some respect thing in their marriage, but maybe I am wrong.
8. When You Make Social Media Declarations
Many agree that when a couple begins declaring their love incessantly on social media platforms, it’s insecure and a sign that the relationship won’t last.
One clarifies, “When it comes out of the blue, I know immediately that this couple is about three months away from breaking up completely, and this is just one last attempt at convincing themselves they are happy.” What do you think?
9. When You Constantly Seek Validation
Social media is the perfect example of people needing to be validated. All the “Look at how good of a person I am” posts. Constantly seeking and needing attention and validation is a sign that you are insecure, and it appears more people than not hold that insecurity. Have you doom-scrolled Facebook lately? Checked out the virtue signaling on Twitter?
10. When You Can Dish It Out, but You Can’t Take It
Another sign of insecurity is when you’re quick to be “brutally honest” with people but have a total meltdown when someone returns the honesty. For example, people who tear others down masquerade it as a joke but then get mad when they get it returned to them. This is because they either aren’t joking or are too sensitive to dishing out the dirt.
11. When You Mock Someone Else’s Achievement
Mocking someone else’s achievement is number one on this list of insecure behaviors. Do you feel the need to diminish someone’s accomplishments? What makes you this way?
Sadly, a young man explains that his father was the epitome of mocking and belittling his achievements instead of recognizing and celebrating them. He quotes, “Yeah, OK, you graduated, so I guess you want a party or something? I went to the marine’s son do a tour of duty; then we can talk.” The user expressed being very sad that day.
12. When You Are Unable to Acknowledge That You Don’t Know Something
It comes across as annoying and insecure when people refuse to admit they don’t know something. Additionally, when they hold strong opinions and a loud voice about a subject they don’t know anything about but refuse to back down. Finally, they feel superior by regurgitating things from news sites and feeds that harbor their own bias.
13. When You Belittle Others
Remember when Donald Trump belittled Ted Cruz and badmouthed his wife, calling her ugly? It is the first thing that popped into my head when I read the comment about belittling others. Having a bully for a president who belittled fellow politicians, reporters, and half of the American population was a nightmare. Please, let’s not do that again. Belittling others to make yourself look better is grossly insecure.
14. When You Are Constantly Projecting and Giving Self-Serving Compliments
A self-serving compliment is when you’re constantly talking about how great you are. Or when you compliment someone else as a roundabout way to say something about yourself. Someone suggests, “That’s the southern lady’s way of insulting you without technically insulting you.” Well, bless your heart.
15. When You One-Up Everything
Do you know a one-upper? This person always has to interrupt your story to tell their story, but how much better their story is. Several people confess they have been or are this person and acknowledge their insecurities. Others argue that conditions such as empathy cause people to share their stories to relate to a person and not as an attempt to “one up” anything.
16. When You Brag About Being “Alpha Males.”
Men who refer to themselves as alphas and women who cling to being a bad or boss B are primarily insecure. One confesses, “I cringe physically and mentally when I hear this.” Others agreed, adding, “If you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my best,” is also insecure and not subtle.
17. When You Announce What Type of Person You Are
Do you know someone who likes to define who they are? These people say things like, “I’m a nice guy,” “I’m honest,” “I’m a humble person,” “I’m a people person,” and “I’m an empath.” Oof. That last one hurt. However, I see their point.
18. When You are a Person Who “Tells It Like It Is”
People who “tell it like it is” or dismiss themselves as “blunt” were called out as being some of the rudest, most insecure, and thoughtless people. Furthermore, some say these people usually spout opinions about things nobody asked them about and are always smug with their meanness.
19. When You Put Others Down for Not Drinking
People who make fun of others for not drinking were called in the thread as insecure and possibly trying to normalize their own alcoholism. Many users confess they are met with questions regarding religious assumptions and sobriety when they tell people they don’t drink.
Some people do not like to drink, which should be normalized. However, one argued that on the flip side, the non-drinkers they know are the vegans and cross-fit folks of sobriety.
20. When You Use Self-Deprecating Humor
When people constantly self-deprecate, it signals to others that they are insecure. Yeah. This one is the worst, and I’ve participated in putting myself down, searching for cheap laughs and, you guessed it, validation. “You’re not fat.” “You’re not stupid.”
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Source: Reddit.
Elizabeth Ervin is the owner of Sober Healing. She is a freelance writer passionate about opioid recovery and has celebrated breaking free since 09-27-2013. She advocates for mental health awareness and encourages others to embrace healing, recovery, and Jesus.