A recent online discussion piqued my interest after someone asked for pieces of advice that they ignored until later in life. Here are ten of the most valuable ones.
1. “Your Reputation Takes Years to Earn — But Only a Moment to Destroy”
Have you heard the expression: “Your reputation takes years to earn but only a moment to destroy?” This is truer now than ever in this digital age of posting strangers in their worst moments for clout.
2. “Trust Is Earned in Drops and Lost in Buckets”
The adage, “Trust is earned in drops and lost in buckets,” says a lot. It can take years to build and earn trust from someone. Still, you will lose it quickly with betrayal, regardless of minor or significant infractions. Once the trust is broken, it’s very difficult to get back. Some may say it is impossible.
3. “You Are the Company You Keep”
My dad always said: “You are the company you keep.” Translation —who you spend time with is who you become. Other variations of this sentiment include: “The associations you keep will inevitably be the qualities you develop,” “Tell me who your friends are, and I’ll tell you who you are,” and “Birds of a feather flock together.”
4. “What You Put In You — Will Come Out of You”
Similarly: “What you put in, you will come out of you.” For example, if you read books all the time, you will spit knowledge. If you spend all day listening to angry news — you will be angry.
5. “Don’t Go Grocery Shopping When You’re Hungry”
“Don’t go grocery shopping when you’re hungry!” The number of times I’ve not heeded that valuable piece of advice has cost me. If you walk into a grocery store hungry, you will buy things impulsively. The worst is when you get home with a bunch of ingredients that don’t work together to make something or a bunch of trash processed foods that aren’t a meal. Don’t do it!
6. “You’ll Never Convince a Narcissist That Their Behavior Is Wrong”
Moreover, don’t waste your breath! You’ll never convince a narcissist that their behavior is wrong. Their ego prohibits them from ever admitting fault or being wrong. It’s a colossal waste of time to attempt to understand their point of view. If you need something from a narcissist, it’s best to feed their ego, get what you came for, and leave.
7. “If You Wouldn’t Take Their Advice — Don’t Take Their Criticism”
“If you wouldn’t take their advice, don’t take their criticism.” There is no reason to be concerned with the opinions of people whom you do not respect anyway.
8. “Don’t Let Your Mouth Write Checks Your Body Can’t Cash”
“Don’t let your mouth write checks your body can’t cash.” Basically, you’re arrogantly making promises that you can’t keep. I’d say this correlates with many people who talk a lot of smack and wind up getting a smackdown.
9. “We Judge Ourselves by Our Intentions — We Judge Everyone Else by Their Actions”
“We judge ourselves by our intentions. We judge everyone else by their actions.” Yeah. This is where grace comes in. Harvard reports it’s: “The fundamental attribution error.” We are quick to judge the actions of others based on their personality or character instead of considering outside or environmental factors. Whereas we tend to do the opposite when considering our own actions.
10. “Trust Your Instincts”
“Trust your instincts,” — even if you really don’t want to! Ugh. This life lesson can be difficult if you ignore your instincts in searching for evidence. For example, you know when your partner is cheating, but you keep waiting to catch them instead of trusting your instincts. Translation? Wasted time and extended heartache.
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Elizabeth Ervin is the owner of Sober Healing. She is a freelance writer passionate about opioid recovery and has celebrated breaking free since 09-27-2013. She advocates for mental health awareness and encourages others to embrace healing, recovery, and Jesus.